


i don't want to fall in love (this world is only gonna break your heart)

by cathydeff



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: And Trying to Co-Parent Without Bloodshed, Domestic Fluff, Kid Fic, M/M, Marriage & Separation, Mutual Pining, No Beta, No beta we die like mne, Schmoop, mention of divorce, relationships need communication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2020-07-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:27:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25486219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cathydeff/pseuds/cathydeff
Summary: It was supposed to be an amicable split, the kids seem well-adjusted, but a foolish heart keeps hoping and it really does help when you have family and friends that care.Or: Ed and Roy split and get back together.
Relationships: Edward Elric/Roy Mustang, Mei Chan | May Chang/Alphonse Elric
Comments: 8
Kudos: 90





	i don't want to fall in love (this world is only gonna break your heart)

**Author's Note:**

> Full disclosure: I am obsessed with the Chris Isaak song Wicked Game and have it on a loop. I have learned it on the ukelele and this story came as a fever dream after bingeing Brotherhood on Netflix. It was supposed to be a 3K max writing exercise but turned into this thing.

“Kids!” Ed yells from the bottom of the stairs. “Get yourselves ready! The car will be here any minute!”

He immediately registers the thundering of little feet as they run around their room, possibly cramming as many books and toys as possible into their tiny backpacks. Ed shakes his head in amusement as he pats down his trousers for his own things: notebook, wallet and keys. Their bag is packed by his feet, ready for a couple of nights away from the house. 

A blond boy of about 5 comes down first, followed by a little girl of 3 with dark hair and eyes. They stop in front of him, grins wide on their faces. 

Ed smiles back, ruffles the boy’s hair and straightens the little girl’s pigtails. 

“You guys have everything?”

“Caitlyn couldn’t decide which book to have for tonight,” Reece, the older of the two, says. “So we had to debate the merits of the Hungry Caterpillar against The Book With No Pictures.”

Caitlyn nods, “It was hard, Daddy.” 

“And what was the consensus of your debate?” Ed asks, amused. His kids were going to be scientists. God forbid, though, they become politicians like someone he knew.

“The Book With No Pictures is best for storytime as there are more funny sounds,” Reece explains with the self-importance of a five-year-old who knew better than their younger sister. 

“An excellent choice,” Ed agrees, nodding imperiously. Caitlyn giggles from behind her stuffed cat. “Well done on highlighting the paramount points.”

Reece’s brow furrows. “What does that word mean?”

Ed chuckles, grabs Caitlyn’s hand and the suitcase in the other as they make their way outside. “Paramount? It means most important.” He pushes the kids out the door and locks it all behind him. The car pulls up just as scheduled, the kids running for the gate. 

Havoc comes out of the driver’s side, opens the passenger door, and sweeps a bow for Caitlyn’s benefit.

“Your carriage awaits, Princess,” he says smoothly. Reece mumbles a greeting to their designated driver and makes his way in. 

Caitlyn reaches up to pat Havoc in the knee. “Thank you, Mr Havoc.” She climbs into the car after her brother. 

“Yeah, thanks for picking us up, Major,” Ed says. He gets in the car and immediately pulls Caitlyn on his lap. She is too small to sit on her own in a moving vehicle. As soon as her daddy has his arms around her, she wiggles contentedly and leans back against his chest. Maybe he can design some sort of safety harness for moving vehicles, especially cars, to ensure safety of the passengers. 

“No problem, Boss,” Havoc says cheerfully and starts the car. “Next stop, Diplomat House.”

Ed settles in his seat, excitement and trepidation warring in his chest. It will be good to see Al and Mei again after Al decided to remain in Xing as an Alchemic Ambassador under the auspices of Fuhrer Grumman. That was four years ago, not long after Reece was born; they haven’t even met Caitlyn yet and Al was basically frothing at the mouth to do so.

However, there was a lot of work to do to keep Amestris and Xing relations alive. When the Elric brothers decided to part ways, with Edward going to the West and Alphonse to the East, Grumman instructed Alphonse to be part of the diplomatic team all in the name of a new burgeoning friendship between the two nations. 

Alphonse, the ever agreeable one, was quick to accept as it meant he had reason to be with the Imperial family more. Ed knew that he really didn’t need the officiousness but it was a great cover to spend more time with Mei, under learning more about Alkahestry and forging ties with the new Emperor, Ling. 

Ed had to smile as he remembered the time he was summoned to Xing under the Emperor’s command, cursing his way through the Xerxesian desert to the new unified country. Alphonse wanted to marry Mei but custom dictated that the terms of marriage must be negotiated with the head of the family. Without any parents, and Ed being the older one, this all fell on him. Ling was more than happy to provide the dowry, as payment for all the meals Ed fed him during his time in Amestris. But really, it was a massive coup for the Chang family to be related to a descendant of the Philosopher of the West, and who also frequently rubs shoulders with powerful people from other nations. 

Ed had come back from his own travels through the West three years after the Promised Day. It was not a shock to everybody that he came back a different man—more content, less noisy, more sure of himself and what he wanted in life. Around that time, he and Winry decided that while they loved each other, they weren’t what each other needed. It was mutual, but not painless. Winry married Fuery three years ago and they divided their time between Rush Valley and Risembool. 

Ed didn’t want to go back to the Military, though Grumman assured him that they will always have a spot for him, with a substantial promotion, should he require it. Instead, he wrote for alchemic journals under a pen name, his papers garnering substantial repute until some fellow alchemists disputed his claims, a battle was set, and he had to out himself as the author of those papers. 

Central University immediately offered him a team and a lab so he could do all of his research and he accepted. Despite not being able to do alchemy, his reputation and knowledge of the subject was second-to-none (though he will argue that Alphonse and Teacher are his equals). He taught during the mornings and spent the afternoons on his research. His classes were always packed, and even those who were not taking the subject were wont to sneak into his lectures to get a glimpse of the golden-haired saviour of the world. 

(He wasn’t aware of it but the students had a rating system for how attractive their Professors were, and he came out on top every month since he joined the faculty. Didn’t help that he was the same age as the students with the most gorgeous smile.) 

For a while, Ed was content. He had a stable job, lots of time to devote to his passion, and went out with friends once in a while. He kept in touch with the old Mustang team, going out for drinks at Rebecca’s new bar every other Friday so they could catch up. 

It was during these nights out that Ed learned Mustang had been promoted again, this time to a full General, the youngest in the history of Amestris. General Armstrong was the only other full General in the top brass. They were celebrating that promotion and someone had immediately volunteered for Mustang to pick up the bar tab of the entire night. Mustang was in too great spirits to refuse and basically threw his wallet Rebecca’s way. 

Ed had sauntered over to Mustang as he sat in the booth, the others well on their way to happy inebriation. Hawkeye had begged off about an hour ago, citing responsibilities early in the morning. 

And it was then that Ed had, for the first time in his life, a conversation with Mustang that wasn’t taunts or orders or anything that made Ed’s blood boil. It was no secret that their relationship was of a friendly aggravation but they were well past the childish taunts of Ed’s youth. They talked about Ed’s research, Mustang’s piles of paperwork, and how Al was settling in Xing. 

They bumped into each other more often after that, as if they were unconsciously seeking each other. They learned that they frequented the same bookshop in the corner of Pfluegerstrasse. They had coffee meetings wherein Ed asked for his opinion in some of his papers, while the General preferred to have Ed over for scotch and use of his extensive library when the Central librarians kicked him out at closing time.

So Mustang/Colonel Shit and Fullmetal became Roy and Ed, and coffee became dinner, and handshakes became kisses. They didn’t mean to keep their relationship secret—as far as they were concerned it was their business—but there was an uproar within family and friends when they were photographed by a lucky bastard as Roy pulled Ed into his house after dinner, kissing him under the porch light. No one was pleased to know of the news from the fucking paper. Ed had to disconnect his phone. 

To their surprise, the general consensus was a ‘fucking finally’. So they weren’t as sneaky as they thought about their mutual attraction. Though Al sulked for a week because Ed didn’t tell him that he was happy, even if it was with his formerly hated CO.

Ed moved in with Roy after 6 months of dating, and Roy proposed shortly after. They were in love, they were sure of what they wanted, and their subsequent wedding was full of tears (from the 3 wedding planners), blood (from an attempted assassination), and expletives (Ed). Ed nearly left for the honeymoon by himself when Roy mentioned that he always meant to die as he lived: making love to a hot blond years his junior. Nobody found the joke funny and Roy nearly did die from Hawkeye’s bullets and Winry’s wrench.

Reece was born from a surrogate two years into the marriage, as golden and as loud as his Daddy, and Roy was in love. No one, even the beloved Uncle Alphonse, was allowed to hold him for the first week of his life and he remained with Roy all the time. Ed took it all in good humour, knowing that Roy would be missing a lot when he got back to work.

Their lives were idyllic: Ed returned to the University part-time after his paternal leave, and Roy was back in office a week after they brought Reece home. Being a General, Roy was busy with keeping the country running in the background while Grumman moulded him as his successor. Ed was loathe to leave Reece to minders and entirely gave up the professorship but continued his research at home and at the lab when Gracia was able to take Reece for a few hours. 

Caitlyn, Ed maintained, was a gift from a largely uncaring universe. One of Madam Christmas’s girls got pregnant, and was about to get rid of the baby when Roy offered to take the child. In return, she was given enough money to start a new life in the South. And Ed had never been so happy when Caitlyn was placed in his arms for the first time. 

The problems started not long after. Ed thought another baby would make Roy think that he actually has a family at home to return to, but he was as busy as ever, coming home long after the children were in bed, and going to work before they woke. 

And so, Ed, at 27, with two children under 4, a house to maintain, and a career that was stalling, snapped. The final straw was when Roy missed Caitlyn’s second birthday. There was a party at the house, and the only person missing was Roy as he was caught up in a meeting with the Drachman diplomats. Ed understood, he really did, why Roy was working so hard. It was not only for the Fuhrership but it was his way of absolving himself of his sins to make the country a better place. 

But his husband and children found themselves second to Roy’s ambitions and Ed decided that this was not what he married into. They discussed it at length before they got married, but promises were broken more often than not in their barely 5-year marriage. 

Roy came home at 1 am one night, after a lengthy meeting with other top brass about the construction of the new Amestris-Xing railway. Ed was waiting for him in the kitchen. He told Roy that he needed time to be away from Central and think about what is best for him and the kids. A lot of hurtful things were said, accusations were hissed in hate, and Ed left with the kids to Risembool to cool down. 

When they came back a week later, Roy had moved out. The separation was kept away from the papers, but there was much speculation why the General was living in the officer’s barracks. A rather nosy reporter had to have wires in his jaw after ambushing Ed on his way home with the children. Grumman was quite quick in ensuring that the whole debacle was smoothed away from the records. 

Back to the present, their divorce is underway, with both sides trying to do as best for their children as they can. Ed and the kids remain in the house, with Roy taking the two every weekend bar a nationwide emergency. According to Ed’s lawyer, the General wasn’t holding up too much of a fight, and was ready to concede everything to Ed as he was the main caregiver. 

Whenever their father had them for the weekend, Ed was only slightly apprehensive every time—Ed will deny to his dying breath that he camped out by the hallway the whole two days when he first had his weekend visitation just so he can be near the phone—but the kids always came back cheerful and loaded with more books. Roy was really trying with them, and it gave Ed the opportunity to decompress for a few days before starting all over again. Roy still stays at the officer’s barracks, which is not the hellhole Ed remembers from his time in the military, but a rather basic suite of rooms with a bedroom, bath, and living area complete with kitchen. 

Ed sighs and tightens his arms around his baby girl. This isn’t exactly what he envisioned when he married Roy but in hindsight, he should have been more prepared. 

As Teacher said, relationships break down, sometimes they don’t work despite the promise of forever, and it was neither their fault. They just drifted apart. Their separation wasn’t acrimonious but the children are suffering, Ed can tell. It’s not easy waking up in the middle of the night with your son pushing you away because they wanted Papa.

Havoc stops in front of a huge white building about a block away from Central Command. It was repurposed from a grand bank to a magnificent and highly secure lodging for visiting dignitaries. Ed can see Roy standing by the steps, his uniform immaculate, his stance the proud General. 

This time, Amestris is playing host to His Imperial Highness Ling, Emperor of Xing, and his vast retinue. And this included the Amestrian Ambassador, Alphonse Elric, and his wife, Princess Mei. 

Before Ed can open the door on his side, it opens by itself, and Roy smiles at them. Ed’s heart stutters without his permission at the sight of his ex-husband. He curses his foolish heart, but mostly Roy—even pushing forty he was still a handsome bastard. 

“Papa!” exclaims Caitlyn, holding out her arms to be carried by her father. Roy laughs and grabs her from Ed’s lap, barely looking at him. 

“Hello, my kitty cat,” Roy croons. Ed alights from the vehicle and helps Reece out as well. Roy immediately puts an arm around the boy and Reece returns the hug, burying his face on his father’s uniform. “Are you all right, baby bird?” 

“Not a baby,” Reece says, holding on to Roy’s hand as they make their way inside. 

Roy chuckles, “No, you will always be my baby.” He takes off his hat and puts it on Reece’s head as he likes the hat, likes that it smells like Papa, that it’s big enough to hide his face in should he want to. “Make sure you don’t lose it, I’ll need it tomorrow.”

Reece grins up at him, and holds onto the hat with two hands. 

Ed bites his lip from the familiar pain of seeing his family like this. He should be used to it but they’ve only been separated for 8 months, and everything is still fresh. He allows the hurt and anger to mask the longing in his heart to just run after them and press his own face to Roy’s neck. 

“I’ll take your bags up to your room, Boss,” Havoc says quietly beside him. Their team is well aware of the whole sorry saga between Roy and Ed, but refuse to take sides, which both parties appreciate. 

“Thanks again, Havoc,” Ed sighs. “We’ll see you at dinner tonight.”

Havoc snaps a salute. “You shall. Go before Al kidnaps your kids back to Xing.”

Ed laughs as he makes his way inside. All of them were in the foyer, as if waiting for him. A tall, blond blur barrels itself to him and he nearly falls down at impact.  
“I missed you too, Al,” Ed whispers, holding his brother tight.

“I’m never gonna leave you again,” Al says to his shoulder. He straightens but doesn’t let go of Ed. “You always end up in trouble when I do.”

Ed pokes him on the side. “Hey, I’ve been taking good care of myself and my two kids!” But he knew what Al meant, and it settled something inside him to know that his best friend is back at his side. 

They part and Mei grabs him this time. Xiao Mei tries to eat his hair. More hugs and welcomes were shared. Al makes himself known to Caitlyn and she is mesmerised. Roy grumbles good-naturedly about his daughter falling out of love with him. Caitlyn says that she’s not marrying Papa anymore but Uncle Al. Roy is devastated for real while Al cackles and dances his way to the dining room with the little girl in his arms.

“So, when are you and Al having your own progeny?” Ed asks Mei as he escorts her to dinner. 

Mei blushes, “Um, well, it’s—”

Ed pats her hand where it’s curled on his elbow. “You’re pregnant, aren’t you?”

Mei starts and stares at him. Xiao Mei snorts on her shoulder.

“H-How?”

“Genius.”

Mei giggles softly. “Yes, I’m four months along now. It’s why we decided to accompany Ling to Amestris, so we can tell everybody.” 

Ed stops in the hallway and gathers her for a hug. “I am so happy for both of you. Congratulations.”

Mei nods against his chest. “Thank you.”

“And where is _my_ hug, Edward?!” Ling demands from behind them. 

“I have no hugs for stupid emperors,” Ed sniffs then softens. “But I do have them for a very good friend who’s been taking care of my brother for me.”

Ling practically jumps into Ed’s arms and twirls them both around. Without warning, Ling kisses him full on the mouth. 

Ed, used to his antics, pushes him away. 

“I told you to stop fucking doing that,” Ed snarls. 

“But that was when you were married,” Ling shrugs. “You’re still welcome to my bed anytime, Ed.”

“I am still married until the judge says so. And I will keep refusing until the end of time.”

Mei rolls her eyes at both of them. “For heaven’s sake, this is a diplomatic mission, Emperor! Behave or I’ll make Lan Fan make you!”

At the mention of the ninja, Ed looks up at the ceiling, trying to pinpoint where she hides. 

“Now, now, you can’t threaten your own Emperor!” Ling whines. 

Mei turns up her nose and marches on ahead of them.

“You love riling up people, don’t you?” Ed grumbles. 

“I believe the term is shit-stirrer,” Ling says softly but his eyes are trained on the figure who watches them carefully. The General’s face is blank but the tension in his shoulders gives him away. 

Ed frowns at this but is resolute about ignoring his ex-husband for the evening unless it was something about the kids. He sweeps past Roy to his seat beside Al as his brother shamelessly cuddles his youngest. 

The dining room is as grand as the rest of what Ed has seen so far. The dinner for tonight, however, is more of an informal welcome from Grumman before the State Dinner tomorrow night that is to be attended by the most powerful people in Amestris. Ed just wanted to see his brother and sister-in-law before he had to share him again to the public but he knows that they have responsibilities now and this is the best he can ask for. There will be time later to have a private discussion with Al. 

“Oh god,” Al intones happily. “I am so regretting not coming to see you earlier, brother. I can’t believe your children are this cute.”

“Hey, what does that mean?” Ed mock-complains. He turns to Reece who is sat on his other side. The boy is quiet, content to watch his surroundings. He knows that Reece isn’t very comfortable with a lot of people, and most of them were from Xing that he haven’t even met before. “How are you doing, baby bird?”

Reece shakes his head. “I’m okay, Daddy.”

“So many people, huh?”

Reece nods. Roy takes his seat on the left of Reece and notices the frown on his son’s face. 

“It’s just dinner, and most people will go to bed right after,” Roy tells him softly, his whole attention only on him. “Then afterwards, you can join me and Daddy to the study so you can have some quiet time for books before bed. Is that okay?”

Reece nods again. Roy kisses him on the forehead before unfolding his napkin for him to place on his lap. Reece shoots a small smile at his father.

Ed stays rooted to his chair, watching this exchange. The fury in his chest is bubbling again until he is deaf to the chatter around him. How dare he? How can the bastard be such an amazing father only _after_ Ed begged him to be there for his kids? This is all he asked, for him to be there for them more, to stop missing story time, to call when he was being detained at work so his children can hear their father’s voice before going to bed. 

He doesn’t notice he is shaking until a hand is placed on his white knuckles. Al squeezes his fist in silent comfort as he continues to coo at his niece. 

Ed breathes deeply and takes his daughter back. “Stop hogging her,” he tells his brother. Caitlyn giggles, loving the attention. 

“No way, Caitlyn and Reece are coming to Xing with me!” Al declares.

Ed bounces Caitlyn on his lap. “Hear that, kids? You want to go to Xing for an extended research trip?” 

Reece jumps from his seat. “Can we? I want to learn Alkahestry!” 

Roy grabs him by the waist as he tries to crawl across his Dad to his Uncle. Al just laughs and laughs as he takes his nephew to his lap this time. He then regales Reece about the comfort of the Imperial car in the newly inaugurated Amestris-Xing railway in its maiden voyage from the Imperial Capital to East City. As far as Ed can tell, at least it had a bed for the long journey, a far cry from the uncomfortable seats they had to endure years ago. 

Unthinkingly, Ed turns to Roy to take Caitlyn so he can take back his son and dinner is announced. 

Roy turns to his daughter. “Would you like help from Papa to eat?” 

Caitlyn agrees, and Roy ties a napkin around her like a bib before sitting her in his lap. An attendant approaches Roy to ask if he requires a high chair for the little one but Roy declines. Satisfied that Roy has their daughter handled, he settles Reece back in his own chair. 

Ed sweeps a gaze around the table. At the top is Grumman and Ling, side by side, and in deep discussion. Mei is seated to Ling’s left, then Alphonse, himself, Reece, Roy, and his team. However, Hawkeye was seated on the right of Grumman, talking to another Xing diplomat. 

Before long, all three courses are finished, Ed is stuffed to the gills, and Grumman has said his goodnights. Riza is taking him back to the Fuhrer’s mansion where she is staying temporarily to facilitate the preparations for the State Banquet. 

The other Xing retinue bids their goodnight before retiring to their rooms. Roy stands, and offers that there is a study down the hall for those who would like a nightcap. Havoc, Breda and Falman decline, stating that they were following Major Hawkeye to the Mansion to organise the security for the party tomorrow. 

Roy scoops up Reece from his chair where he is starting to drowse while Ed carefully positions a half-asleep Caitlyn in his arms. 

“Would you like storytime in the study or in bed,” Ed asks them quietly. 

“Study, please,” Reece yawns. “Want to talk to Uncle…about…Alkahestry…” 

“You can do that tomorrow at breakfast,” Roy suggests but Reece shakes his head. 

“Story,” Caitlyn pipes up. Al grabs the kids backpacks where they were stashed under the table and he, Mei and Ling follow the family to the study. 

They settle around the fire, with Roy and Ed forced to share a couch together as their children demanded that they both tell the story, with them swapping off each page. Ed forgot how good Roy was at voices, hence why he was the chief storyteller for a time, until— 

Ed swallows a sigh for the umpteenth time that night. It is the most he has been around the bastard since their separation, so yes, he is frazzled, confused, and downright angry. It also doesn’t help that Roy is sitting so close, he can feel his thigh pressed against his, his cologne wafting over until it is all Ed can do not to lean his head on that broad shoulder. 

Looking at his son so content in his father’s arms, arms that he was intimately acquainted with for 8 years, is like an ice pick to the heart. He looks down to see that Caitlyn is fully asleep and Reece well on his way. 

He turns to the others who were having a quiet conversation. “We’ll just take the kids to bed and come back,” Ed informs them quietly. 

Ling shakes his head, “No need, we’ll see you tomorrow at breakfast. Good night, Ed.” He pointedly does not look at Roy. Ed knows that Ling puts the dissolution of their marriage squarely in Roy’s shoulders and nothing would dissuade him otherwise. Goodnights were passed around, with Ed hugging his brother tightly, a little girl squashed between them. 

Roy and Ed make their way to the room Ed was offered for the night. They are quiet, save for their footsteps against marble. 

Roy pushes the door open, and settles Reece down on the king-sized bed. Ed does the same with Caitlyn before rooting through their bag for the kids’ pyjamas. He tosses Roy Reece’s pair while he changes their daughter into her nightdress. 

“Can you grab a couple of wet flannels in the bathroom?” Ed asks as he stuffs the dirty clothes in a bag. Roy steps into the bathroom to do as bid as Ed takes the opportunity to get changed as well. He has just pulled his hair from its ponytail when Roy comes back and silently passes him a warm cloth. 

They wipe their children’s faces and hands sticky from dinner and tuck them in the big bed. Ed and Roy take turns to kiss them good night on their foreheads. For a while, they just sit on the bed, watching them sleep, refusing to break the peace that settles between them. 

Roy breathes deeply. “Ed, I—” 

Ed reaches over to put his hand over Roy’s, the first time he has touched him voluntarily in eight months. He had forgotten how warm he is. Roy, the opportunist, grabs his hand tight. 

“Not now, please,” Ed pleads quietly. “Not in front of the kids.” 

Roy raises his hand to press a gentle kiss on the knuckles. “I’ll wait for however long you want me to, Ed.” 

Ed harshly pulls away from Roy’s grasp. “Good night, Roy,” he says forcefully. 

Roy sighs and stands. “Good night, Ed.” 

He steps out the door and Ed has to bite the back of his hand to keep the scream from coming out. 

A few minutes after Roy’s departure, there is a soft knock outside. Ed opens to Al, who smiles at his brother softly. 

“Sorry, brother, but I need to talk to you,” Al says, pushing his way inside. 

“Okay, let’s take it to the balcony,” Ed agrees, knowing that this conversation could not be put off, no matter how exhausted he is. He closes the balcony doors and leans against the railing, keeping his eyes on the little figures sleeping on the bed. 

“How are you, I mean really?” Al starts. 

“I could be better,” Ed admits. Trust Al to be able to pry loose all of his innermost secrets even a therapist took weeks to unravel. “There are days I just don’t want to get out of bed, and this crushing weight is keeping me immobile half the time, but then I hear the kids, and then I have a reason to get up again.” He wraps his arms around himself against the chill and Al embraces him, the warmth of his brother a balm to his fractured emotions. 

“You’re raising amazing children, brother,” Al says. “They are so, so happy and smart, and everything I hope my own children will be.” 

Ed smiles. “Congratulations, Mei told me.” 

“She said you figured it out.” 

“Wasn’t hard. Is that why you’re attached to my kids? Practicing?” 

“Yes, and no. I love them because they’re part of you.” 

Ed’s face crumples. “Al, I fucked up. I fucked up so bad.” 

“You haven’t, don’t start believing—” 

“They need their father and I just pushed him away, and did you not see how happy they were when that bastard was around? I—I’m not enough!” 

“Shut up, and listen to me.” There is steel in Alphonse’s voice that makes Ed want to howl. When did he become the older brother? “You did right by those kids. Every parent wants to give them the world but sometimes it’s not possible. You gave up a career in the University to take care of them, basically forgot about alchemy, your first love, for the new love you give your kids every single day. It is not your fault your marriage ended. 

“It wasn’t working for you, so you made the decision to end things. There is no shame in that. You respect yourself too much to be second fiddle to the rest of the country. No, you are not selfish. You have two kids under five, for heaven’s sake, and you were basically raising them alone. 

“But, brother, you didn’t see what Ling, Mei and I saw tonight. We saw two parents loving their children to hell and back, even if they weren’t together, you still made a great team, and the two recognise that. They love you so much. When I was with Caitlyn, all she could talk about was how Daddy is the best and it would be great to have Papa around more often.” 

Ed makes a noise in his throat like a dying moose and Al laughs but there is a note of sadness to it. 

“You know why she wants Papa around? It’s because it makes Daddy smile. And Daddy needs to smile more.” 

This time, Ed couldn’t stop the tears. 

“I still fucking love him, Al,” he sobs. “I want him back, I want somebody there to help me with the kids, be part of the joy they bring me everyday, but all I want is him, and I am so fucked up inside because of it.” 

“When Elrics love, they love fiercely,” Al says. “That’s what Mei told me.” 

“I don’t want to love him anymore.” 

“Then don’t.” 

Can it really be that simple? Can Ed forget about 8 years with the man who would become the father to his children? 

“It’s not that easy, I know,” Al soothes, as if reading Ed’s mind. “But it can be done. I think you’ll feel better when the divorce comes through. But please, think of what you really want and for a moment, admit to yourself that the kids need a dad who loves himself enough as well.” 

And Ed can only hope that Al is right, as always. 

Morning brings a certain clarity to it that Ed appreciates. He turns to his side and sees his snoring children beside him on the bed and resolves to do better. He should contact the lawyer on Monday, push the court date through. However, he allows himself that modicum of hope in his chest, that if—if they talked…he would listen. 

Ed rises before the two, as always, and makes himself presentable before getting the kids up and ready for breakfast. 

As he is helping Caitlyn with her hair, someone knocks on the door. 

“Come in!” he calls. 

Roy opens the door and the kids cheer. Ed notices that he’s not wearing his uniform, and looks like a million cens in his navy three piece. Fucking hormones, it’s like he’s 16 again and fantasising about climbing him like a tree. 

Roy smiles at his family. “I thought we could all go to the dining room together for breakfast,” he says to Ed. Reece immediately demands to be picked up, which Roy laughingly agrees to. 

“I want Papa cuddles, too!” Caitlyn says crossly from her perch on the bed. Ed will forever rejoice the day Caitlyn is able to do complete sentences and tell him exactly what she wanted. 

“Well, I do have another arm,” Roy says to their little girl. 

Ed frowns at him. “You sure you can carry them both, old man?” 

“I will have you know I can carry all three of you at once,” Roy teases. Ed raises an eyebrow at him but places Caitlyn in his waiting arm. 

“You guys go on, then, I’ll just pack up the bag so we’re ready to go after breakfast.” 

“Ah, about that, I have the day off today,” Roy says. “So I was going to join you all for the day with Al and Mei.” 

“That’s not necessary—” 

“Technically, it is my day with the kids,” Roy interrupts him smoothly. “But I also know they would like to spend time with their Uncle Al before he gets pulled every which way next week for official matters. It would be nice to spend some time with them, too, seeing as I will miss most of their trip back here.” 

Ed grits his teeth. What he said made sense but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t hate his cool logic. 

“Fine,” he tries to say evenly. “But they’re going to Gracia’s at four as I need to prepare for the State Dinner.” 

Roy’s and the children’s smiles were incandescent. Ed is ready to bash him in the head with his left leg. 

\-- 

Ed tries. He really, really does. Tries to smile and enjoy the day, connects with his kids when they want his attention, anticipates their needs as always. They have decided on a day at the aquarium as Caitlyn is incredibly fascinated with the octopus, before tea with Gracia and Elicia. 

The only thorn in his side is Roy. Roy, the man who had changed Caitlyn’s diaper exactly five times in the course of her infancy. Roy, the man who was supposed to teach his son how to play the piano but paid someone else to do it. Roy, his bastard of an ex-husband. 

This Roy, though, is the picture of a doting father, barely letting Caitlyn on the ground and a hand on Reece’s shoulder the whole time. 

Ed sits on the bench while Al and Mei occupy the children with scientific names of the various fish and how their taxonomy was derived. Reece is listening carefully while Caitlyn bobs her head along, though Ed doubts she was following the discussion. 

Roy sits beside him and Ed does not allow himself to tense up at his proximity. 

“It’s nearly lunch time,” Roy says. “We need to figure out where to have something to eat before the little ones decide to mutiny.” 

Ed snorts ungracefully. “There’s a halfway decent restaurant here not too far from the sea lions. The choice is crap for adults unless you like soggy salad but the chicken nuggets are shaped like starfish and that’s all they care about.” 

A corner of Roy’s mouth lifts up. “I always have a pack of dinosaur nuggets for their weekend with me.” 

“And of course, it falls to me to make sure that the rest of their meals are balanced.” 

“Edward, you know that is not what I meant—” 

Ed shakes his head. “No, I apologise.” He is a fucking adult with two children. He will be courteous to the father of his children, no matter how much he wants to punch him in the dick. “That was uncalled for.” 

Roy stares at him for a long minute and it makes Ed twitch. 

“What? You don’t think I’m capable of acknowledging my own faults?” he demands. 

“No, it was never that, just that you are the better parent, I’m not foolish enough not to admit that and—” A shrug in place of his usual eloquence. A speechless Roy is a rare sight indeed. 

“Out with it,” Ed says sharply when it is clear Roy has something else to say. “We have five minutes before the kids demand food and you wanted to talk last night.”  
Roy leans back on the bench and doesn’t meet his eyes. 

“I bought a house near Command,” he says. “I thought that the children also need a backyard to play in during the weekends, and my officer’s suites are no longer comfortable for them. It’s not big but there is space for me to expand when they get older.” 

Ed could have been a statue for how still he is in his seat. The churning in his gut is in overdrive, and all he can think of is that Roy is finally moving on. Buying a house meant that he found a new home, and this is the true final nail in the coffin of their marriage. 

There is a lump in his throat, his eyes are burning, the sick feeling in his stomach is back, but he forces himself to respond. 

“Okay,” he says, voice totally without inflection, as if Roy’s words were a clear non-surprise. 

“I want to pick up the children on Wednesday so we can go to the furniture shop and they can choose what they want in their rooms,” Roy explains, still not looking at him. For all who were watching them interact, it is as if two strangers were discussing the weather and not the absolute break down of years together. “I won’t be able to take them on Friday night as it is moving day but can have them over on Saturday afternoon when there should be some semblance of order by then so they don’t have to trip all over boxes. I’ll keep them on until Monday afternoon, and I think they’d enjoy a tour of Command.” 

Ed forces himself to breathe normally, letting it out on a gust through his nose as if Roy didn’t just ruin any tiny sliver of hope he still had that maybe—maybe. 

What maybe? That he would magically wake up and beg at Ed’s feet for forgiveness? Admit that he shouldn’t have left him to deal with everything at home while he rose through the ranks? The vitriol in his chest swirls into a terrifying crescendo, leaving nothing in its wake but a scorched earth and then suddenly, Ed internally slumps like a puppet with its strings cut but physically remains straight-backed against the bench. 

He can choose to be angry forever, and where would that leave him? Roy has certainly moved on, no doubt already thinking ten steps further. He might as well do the same.

“Okay,” Ed replies. “Reece finishes daycare at 2 on Wednesdays, forgot to give you the new schedule, and Caitlyn is usually with me all day that day but we can meet up at the centre so its easier for you to pick them up together. Just remember to drop them off at 5 for dinner.” Ed stands, needing to be with his children now.  


He turns to Roy, as if he just had a thought, “Oh, let me know when you want to pick up your books from the library and please take the fine china with you. I don’t think there will be dinner parties in my future.” 

And with that parting shot, Ed joins his family, and resolutely refuses to look back. 

_\--_

“I really do not understand how they make these things so stiff,” Ed complains mightily as he struggles with his bow tie. Gracia chuckles and tells him to turn around so she can do it for him. 

“You should come with me as my plus one,” he offers in the silence. Women like dressing up and stuff, don’t they? 

“And leave the three alone?” she huffs and gives the tie one last tug. “The whole building will explode.” She steps out from his space and instructs him to sit on the couch so she can do his hair. 

After the day at the aquarium, they had all squashed themselves into a car and to the Hughes’ for tea and apple pie before the adults had to leave to get ready for the party. It was a wonderful welcoming for Al and Mei, and Gracia and Elicia were delighted with the news of a new Elric baby on the way. There was a short silence as they remembered Maes, and how he would have been over the moon at the thought of more children running around. 

Before long, Al and Mei had departed, and Roy had said goodbye to his kids with a promise of picking them up tomorrow to have them until Monday. 

Elicia had taken Reece and Caitlyn to her room to play while Gracia helped Ed into his formal wear. 

“I tell you what, next week you and I can go out for a nice dinner just the two of us,” Ed offers. He knows now how lonely it can be to be a single parent. 

Gracia smiles, hums in agreement as she brushes his hair before plaiting it. One of Ed’s favourite nighttime rituals was when Roy would brush his hair until it shone; Roy was fascinated with his hair, always said that it was the brightest thing he had ever seen, and took to touching it as much as possible now that he allowed. 

Now that he knows that times like that would be that—mere fond memories—it isn’t as painful as it has been. He can grieve for their lost relationship, but he can smile at the better times, and be grateful that for all their faults, they still have Reece and Caitlyn. 

“All done,” Gracia says, and Ed turns to the mirror. “Don’t you look handsome?” 

Ed grins. “Now I’m ready.” 

_\--_

The party is in full swing with dignitaries, nobilities, and military officers mingling around the welcoming foyer of the Fuhrer’s mansion. Fuhrer Grumman opened the celebrations with a small speech about the success of the Amestris-Xing railway, and with it, improved diplomatic and economic relations between the two nations. A phone line is well underway and will be the first line that connects the East to the West. Al and Ed were in complete rapture at knowing that they are now only a train ride or a phone call away.Ling was re-introduced as the Guest of Honour, and they were paired up to make their way to the main hall for the formal banquet. 

Ed grins at Riza, who is to be his partner for the night, and holds out an arm which she takes with a small smile. Her hair is down and curled into soft waves, with her green dress hugging her like a second skin. It is normally a white tie event but as white is a funeral colour for Xing, it was deemed prudent to allow some flexibility and a myriad of colours were on show for the evening. Ed himself is wearing a deep burgundy waistcoat. 

“You look beautiful, Riza,” Ed says as they wait their turn to proceed through the red-carpeted hallway. “And you did an amazing job organising all this.” 

Riza huffs, her version of a laugh. “It was a year in the making, and the caterers were late this morning.” Ed doesn’t miss the slight pride in her eyes. “But yes, everybody pulled through for this.” 

From his peripheral vision, he can see Roy a few steps ahead. He is to escort General Armstrong, and stands just behind Grumman and Ling who are decked in their finery. At least, Grumman is wearing his dress uniform and Ling is wearing miles of red and gold silk with his hair piled at the top of his head in a complicated knot pinned with a golden phoenix. 

But damn, his heart does a little flip flop at seeing Roy all dressed up. The last time he had seen him clean up like this was a couple of years ago at another State dinner and Ed was tempted to ruffle him all up again before they even left the house. He stands tall, his dark blue dress uniform starched to perfection while his many medals sparkled under the lights. He had slicked his hair back, and Ed has to surreptitiously pat his face to see if he has drooled. 

“You still love him, don’t you,” Riza says from his side. 

“I do,” Ed says. “But he is moving on, and so should I.” He straightens his posture as they follow the people in front of them, taking his steps slow and measured. “A part of me will always love him, but hopefully, we can get past it.” 

Riza squeezes his arm in silent sympathy. “Roy has been my oldest friend but even I do not understand his actions sometimes. It has been my job for the past three decades to anticipate what he needed so I can continue to protect him. I didn’t realise, for a time, that you were the one thing he wanted most and needed as well.” 

Ed is about to argue but Riza shoots him a look. “It is truly not my place to say this, but I ask you as a friend. Please don’t abandon him fully. He still needs you, whether he tells you or not.” 

Ed nods stiffly and pulls out his chair for her. “I needed him too,” he says so quietly he doubted she could hear but she sighs and speaks no more of the subject. 

To Ed’s great horror, Roy is seated on his right. As the Hero of Promised Day, Ed is placed on the top table. Grumman and Ling, as the Heads of State, were in the middle. Roy is on the Fuhrer’s right, while Armstrong is on the other side of Ling. Ed locates Al just beyond Armstrong and gives him a cheery wave. 

“Hello, Edward,” Roy says, taking his seat. 

“Hi,” Ed mumbles petulantly. 

The dinner passes in a blur for Ed, with him trying to talk more to Riza but her attention is grabbed by the Major General of Xing on her right. So Ed is left with small talk with his ex, and they settled on a safe topic: their shared children. Ed gives him updates on Reece flourishing at daycare and making friends while Caitlyn has been counting to thirty since last week. That and he forgets which cutlery to use for the fish until Roy coughs delicately, raises his own chosen fork and Ed glares at him, stopping himself from doing a crude gesture. 

For a while, it felt good, as if it were the old days wherein he and Roy could just exist as two people having a friendly banter. It does help that they have a subject that they could both latch on for ages without the need to say something else. 

Ed is genuinely surprised when the coffees come and Grumman stands to invite everyone to the ballroom for a dance and more alcohol. He and Roy just had two and a half hours of conversation without reducing themselves to jeers and snide remarks. He is totally getting the hang of this being an adult thing. 

Ed takes to his feet, ready to escort Riza again to the ballroom but Ling materialises beside him, and imperiously requests that Ed take him to the room next door.  
There are murmurs around the room, but Ed, being Ed, ignores the importance of such a request, shrugs and lets himself be pulled away. 

As soon as they get to the ballroom, though, Ling stands in the middle, his clutch on Ed not relenting. He clears his throat and everyone stands to his attention. 

“Thank you so much for the warm welcome to your country,” Ling says to the room at large. “It is certainly a marked difference to when I first came to Amestris as a young man.” 

Titters are heard as the crowd allude in soft hushes about the Promised Day. 

“We all, of course, owe our lives to this man with me, our brilliant alchemist Mr Edward Elric,” Ling continues. 

Ed blushes to the roots of his hair at all the attention—he always hated being in the centre of it and only was comfortable with so many eyes on him during lectures—and hisses to Ling, “Shut up or I’ll punch your lights out.” 

He can see Roy in the crowd, ramrod straight and pale. Al and Mei have frowns on their faces while the rest of the people were puzzled as to what is happening. 

“That said, as the Emperor of Xing, the reincarnation of the Golden Phoenix of Xingdu, Son of Heaven, I declare Edward Elric as part of my Imperial Inner Court, and all it entails. He has the protection of my empire and unquestionable fealty.” He bows to Edward low and kisses his hand. Immediately, as if one, everyone from Xing get on their knees where they stood and bow to Edward with their heads on the ground. Mei is saved from the floor by Al grabbing her quickly and shaking his head. Mei stares at her husband in horror and Al sighs deeply and relents, the both of them bowing low to Edward as well. Xiao Mei squeaks and bows on top of Mei’s head. 

Ed gapes at Ling, his mouth moving but nothing coming out. The rest of the guests are silent as well. 

“A dinner and a show,” General Armstrong observes mildly, taking a sip of her champagne. 

_\--_

“You fucking declared war! On my fucking ex-husband you sentient excuse for a piece of shit!” Ed grabs a vase, smashes it against the wall, near to where Ling’s head is. After that display, Ed had gone completely red and dragged Ling to the nearest empty room, which turns to be an office of sorts. 

Ed picks up another breakable item, this time a lamp, and aims it for Ling’s general direction. 

Immediately, Lan Fan comes to Ling’s aide but Ling raises a hand to stop her and she nods, disappearing in the shadows again. 

“This is none of your fucking business!” Ed roars, absolutely livid. He had not been this angry since punching Father to death. “My own brother was on his fucking knees for me! Ambassador or not he knew he would be shunned in your sorry courts if they knew he refused to bow to me! His fucking brother! And you fucking did that! How could you!” 

Another crash and the wooden panel of the wall splintered against the assault. 

“Stop fucking running away and let me kill you. I’m detaching my fucking leg and beating you to death with it! Fuck you, Ling!” 

He throws another few items before collapsing on a chair, breathing harshly, his clothes and hair a rumpled disarray. 

“You done?” Ling asks, taking a seat in front of Ed. 

“Fuck you,” Ed repeats. 

Ling sighs. “You are my friend, first and foremost and it killed me to hear you were so unhappy. So I decided that enough is enough. Did you not see yourself tonight, in his presence? One conversation and it’s as if you could wipe out years of neglect from your own husband.” 

“What I decide to do in regards to my ex-husband is my business,” Ed growls. “I decided to be a grown up about this and remain cordial to the motherfucking father of my children. I don’t give a shit that my heart wants to shrivel up in his presence, or that I would die to be held in his arms one more time. My needs are second to my children’s.” 

“And you, for all your knowledge, know how unhealthy that is.” 

“Says the man without children,” Ed scoffs. 

“Because I do not require an heir with a Stone in my possession,” he reminds gently. “Should I find myself wanting an heir I will respect their mothers, and they all know that it is the best that they can get from me. They will know that from the beginning so there are no expectations. However, you and Mustang were—are—in love unlike anything I have ever seen, and that love overflowed to your incredibly lucky offspring. A wise philosopher in Xing said that the best you can do for your children is to love your spouse.” 

Ed slumps forward, leaning his forehead against a hand. 

“So what is the point of that whole shitty awful display? I’d ask god why they hate me so much if I fucking believed there is one.” 

“Forcing his hand,” Ling explains cheerfully. “I basically declared to the world that you are my chosen Imperial Consort, so I suppose you could be called the Empress of Xing.” 

“You fucking moron! I told you I will never want you in that way!” 

Ed is hyperventilating. He can see the headlines tomorrow: **Former Alchemist Divorces General Touted Next for Fuhrership for Emperor of Xing – Will His Quest for Power Destroy Amestris?**

Ling laughs, delighted. “It won’t be you who will destroy Amestris, though yeou did try your damnedest in your teenage years.” So Ed did say that out loud. “As much as it pains me so, I will still hold that memory of us in the palace gardens. I shall never look at plum blossoms the same way again.” 

Ed throws a cushion which Ling easily dodges. He turns and stands, smoothing his robe back into place. 

“Ah, here he is.” He makes his way to the door and opens it. Ed cracks an eye to see Roy standing outside, his face impassive as he speaks lowly to Ling which the other man took in merry stride. Ling laughs at him as if he said something amusing, pats his face and waltzes out the door. 

Roy stands before Ed, and he has never seen the man so unsure it made his stomach turn. This was a man who faced death and war and the absolute destruction of the world and got his eyesight taken but he was still the stoic soldier. 

Right now, he looks like a man who didn’t know how to speak after years as a mute. 

“Sit the fuck down,” Ed grumbles. “I’m fucking exhausted just looking at you.” 

Roy hastily takes the seat Ling vacated. “I apologise. Can I get you anything?” 

“Stop with the polite shit,” Ed snaps. “What did you tell Ling just now?” 

“That it would not bode well for the newly instated Emperor of Xing to be threatening a General of the Amestris Army, especially since said General has just secured alliances with Drachma and Aerugo with Creta in the works well.” 

“You wankers and your petty squabbles as to who has the bigger dick,” Ed moans. “I am seriously going to disown any other Elric who goes into politics. Reece is going to be an academic, and Caitlyn can be a dairy farmer for all I care as long as they don’t follow your shoes.” 

Roy’s smile is crooked, and he instantly looks younger. Ed bites his cheek to stop the words coming out. He turns his head away. 

“Ed, will you please look at me?” Roy implores and Ed looks back, knowing that this is a conversation years in the making. He sprawls in his chair, his feet stretched in front of him but gives Roy his full attention. 

“I knew you were struggling at home,” Roy begins, his tone soft yet strong. “And I am so sorry I let it get on for so long without helping. I didn’t even have an excuse—I let work overtake everything but I comforted myself with the lie that you will ask if it all became too much. But it’s as if I didn’t know how you operated. How you will take on everything yourself even if it killed you. I should have been the husband I promised I would be when I vowed to god and country I will support you and love you to my dying breath.” 

Roy takes a shuddering breath, rubs the bridge of his nose before continuing, “I am not the husband I thought I should have been, and it took losing you and the children to realise that. When you asked for time apart, I felt it was the only thing I could do for you. So I let you go, and I shouldn’t have. I should have fought for you, asked you what you wanted of me, and I would have happily given you my beating heart had you requested it. 

“I wanted to come back home so much it was a constant ache. I thought I would let you cool down, then we can talk, but you took my silence for acquiescence and—dear heaven, my world shattered in front of my eyes when Hawkeye delivered the divorce papers to my desk. I have never seen her pity me before and it killed me.” He gives a short, mirthless laugh. “I had to pull rank at the team as they would not leave me alone. Madam Christmas made sure I was banned from most bars lest I drown myself in alcohol. 

“I lived for those scant few seconds I could see you when I picked up the two and when I dropped them off. God, you’re still as beautiful as the day I met you again after your travels. I thought my heart was in my shoe when you alighted that train. I didn’t expect that fierceness of emotion and I dismissed it as pride for seeing you grown after knowing all of your struggles. But I was deluding myself. I fell in love with you so quickly and completely I was not aware of my own feelings until you told me you and Winry had decided to part ways, and suddenly, all I’ve ever wanted in life was in front of me for the taking.” 

There is a lump on Ed’s throat but he cannot look away from Roy. This is all he ever wanted to hear from him at the beginning but he doesn’t feel relief or elation, but rather a pang of sadness that it took this long. 

“I still love you, I still want you, and I will force myself to be content with whatever scraps of affection you are willing to give me.” Roy collapses to his knees in front of Edward. 

“Tell me you can forgive an old idiot for his mistakes, and while my promises mean dirt to you, I cannot imagine a life without you in it.” 

Ed can’t help it. He raises a hand, brushes back Roy’s hair, and leans his head against his. 

“I think I have forgiven you for a while now,” Ed says. “The fault lay with us both, I cannot blame it all on you. You’re right, I didn’t ask for help, but I thought I didn’t need to say it. We needed to sit down and talk but we’re too stubborn to admit when we’re wrong.” 

Ed rises from his seat and offers Roy a hand up. “I think we’ve made enough commotion for one night. Let’s get back to the house to continue this discussion.” He carefully does not call it home. 

“We’re on the first floor. If we climb out that window and make our way to the parking lot, we can go,” Roy suggests. 

Ed’s grin is sharp against his tired face. “Best idea you’ve had all day.” 

_\--_

Ed is finally out of his itchy suit and wrapped up in his softest robe. Roy is across him from the kitchen table, nursing a mug of coffee, his formal jacket discarded and shirt rolled up at the cuffs. Ed curls his hands around his own mug, breathing in the honeyed tea. 

“I couldn’t sleep in our bed for a long while,” Ed confesses to his drink. “I kept waking up in the middle of the night thinking why your side was cold. I was a zombie in the mornings until I had the brilliant idea to start sleeping in the library. You know how I was appalled at myself for spending that much on a couch? My back is eternally grateful for that bit of fiscal irresponsibility.” 

Roy smiles, a soft thing that transforms his whole face. It is a look Ed has only seen him direct to his most loved people and suddenly, the width of the table between them is too far. 

“I’ve spoken to Fuhrer Grumman a while back,” Roy explains. “He reminded me that the beauty of being in a higher rank in the military is the ability to set my own hours and more subordinates to be able to delegate more tasks. I was so used to ensuring everything was done to my standards, after all the work I did in Ishval that it was a tough habit to break.” 

Ed starts, stares at him. Roy continues, “So yes, I have reduced my hours at the office, conscripted another couple of Colonels under my command to handle the smaller things, and will be traveling less for diplomatic missions.” 

Roy reaches out, holds Ed’s hand in his. “I was going to tell you soon when everything was settled. That I could have the children over more, that if you would allow me, I could take all three of you for dinner again under the guise of co-parenting.” His grin is small but self-deprecating. “I had delusions of wooing you again. Fine, the divorce goes through, but it doesn’t mean I couldn’t make you fall in love with me all over again.” 

“You utter fucker,” Ed sobs. He buries his face in his hands and weeps for the unnecessary pain they inflicted upon each other for months—years, even. “No more, please, Roy, just stop with the strategies, the—the manipulation. We are your family, not your political rival. I can’t take you back in my life if you promise to change but still do shit like that!” 

Roy’s chair clatters behind him as he rounds the table to take Ed in his embrace. “My darling, I’m sorry, I will tell you everything from now on, no more lies, this is my one promise to you. And if I break it, you can take the children with you to Xing and I won’t declare war against them.” 

Ed lets out a half wail, half-laugh noise. Roy continues to hold him, rubbing circles on his back. 

As soon as Ed calms down, he can feel his body crashing, the day’s events catching up on him. Sleep is his only friend tonight. 

“Come up to bed, bastard,” Ed orders and Roy is helpless but to follow. He shucks his robe and climbs in. Roy stands beside his side of the bed and Ed opens an eye to sleepily glare at him. “Get in, you moron.” 

Roy nods, takes off his dress shirt and trousers, leaving him in his undershirt and boxers. He slides into the cool sheets, scarcely believing he is allowed to do this again and relishing how the night unraveled. Ed scoots closer and Roy doesn’t waste a second to hold him like he has dreamt of. 

Ed falls asleep to the sound of Roy’s heartbeat underneath his ear. 

_\--_

Ed wakes to a warm weight pinning him down the soft mattress, Roy’s whistling snore in his ear. He smiles slightly, burrows closer to the oft missed heat and breathes deeply. 

He knows that there are more that they need to talk about, and he might ask Roy to come with him for a few sessions as the therapist recommended. 

He wonders idly if Roy would be up for that when his no-longer-ex-husband stirs and squeezes him tighter. 

“Not dreaming, then,” Roy mumbles sleepily, petting Ed’s hair. 

“No,” Ed agrees. 

“We have a lot to talk about,” Roy says. 

“We do.” 

“And the kids.” 

“Yes.” 

“We need to pick them up soon.” 

“We have a bit. Can I hold you for a while longer?” 

“Anything you want, my sunshine.” 

_\--_

Roy is in the shower while Ed makes the bed and places Roy’s uniform on top of the covers to straighten them out. They will have to do as he didn’t have any other clothing left in the house. He smiles when he sees the State Alchemist watch still attached to the trousers and thinks fondly of the times when that watch saved his ass during missions. He takes it out of the pocket and stops when he can see a gold ring attached to the chain—Roy’s wedding ring, with an array engraved inside that would allow Roy to be tracked anywhere within a 100-mile radius. As Ed can no longer perform alchemy, another array was etched onto Roy’s that will activate the tracking array on Ed’s own ring.  
Al had the same arrays on his own wedding rings. 

He sighs and sits on the bed, waiting for the other man to finish his morning ablutions. 

“I think I might have to borrow a pair of underwear from you, my love,” Roy says as he comes in, a towel wrapped around his waist. He sees Ed cradling his watch in his hands and approaches him slowly. 

“Ed?” he asks, not knowing what else to say. 

“You’ve kept it with you?” Ed questions, a quiver in his voice. 

“Of course, I have,” Roy says. “I couldn’t bear to get rid of it.” 

“Me neither,” Ed says and pulls out a chain from his neck which Roy had missed last night. His wedding ring is hanging on it. 

“It settled me knowing I knew where you were at any given time,” Roy offers though Ed doesn’t really need the explanation. “That even if you didn’t need me anymore, I could still protect you.” 

Roy detaches his ring from his watch-chain as Ed does the same on his necklace. Roy slides Ed’s ring back in his finger and Ed reciprocates. They hold hands and smile at each other. 

There is a glint of warning in Ed’s eyes, however, and Roy raises his beloved’s hand to kiss on his latest promise. 

_One last chance. I won’t waste it._

_\--_

To say that the children are happy but confused when both parents turn up at Gracia’s to pick them up is an understatement. 

Gracia beckons them in for some brunch as she wants to know what happened last night. She raises her eyebrow at Ed and pointedly glances at his finger but he laughs, awkward and embarassed, and shakes his head. He will tell her everything later. 

Ed will never turn down free food so they all make their way to the dining room where Gracia has prepared a feast. They eat, noisily, joyfully, and Reece and Caitlyn are enjoying the attention from both parents at once. 

“So I believe congratulations are in order,” Gracia says primly, wiping her mouth delicately with a napkin. Elicia looks around the table in confusion. 

Ed and Roy blush and raise their joined hands to the top of the table. 

“We talked last night,” Roy says but the smile in his face belies his bliss. 

“There is still a lot to talk about,” Ed asserts. 

Roy nods. “Gracia, can we borrow the living room for a moment, we need to explain a few things to Reece and Caitlyn.” 

Gracia graciously allows them space as she and Elicia take care of the dishes. Ed promises to come and help in a minute. 

Reece and Caitlyn stare at their parents as they sit on the coffee table in front of them. 

“Darlings,” Roy begins. “How would you feel if I stay the night?” 

Reece is about to reply when Ed grouses, “Oh for heaven’s sake. They’re our babies but they’re not _babies_.” 

Ed grabs a tiny hand from each child. 

“Daddy and Papa love you,” Ed says. “However, there was a time when we didn’t agree with each other, and as you know, Papa had to move out of the house. You know this, don’t you?” 

Reece nods slowly, and Caitlyn says a small affirmation and shoves her hand in her mouth. Roy pulls it out and wipes it with a handkerchief but doesn’t let go of his daughter. 

“But Papa and I had a talk last night,” Ed relates. “And we decided that Papa is moving back to the house with us so he can help take more care of you.” 

Reece turns to their father, shy hope in his eyes. “You mean it?” 

“Yes, and we want to know if this is acceptable for you,” Roy adds. “We want to be together again, but this is a huge change in your routine.” 

Reece is puzzled at this and cocks his head. “How can it be a change when things are getting back to the way they were?” 

Ed laughs, full-bellied and brilliant. Roy grins at his son, ruffling his hair. 

“You’re right,” Ed declares, wiping an eye. “How about you, Caitlyn? What do you think?” 

Caitlyn plays with the gold ring on Roy’s finger, head down and frown on her face. 

“More storytime with Papa?” she says delicately. 

“As much story time as you’d like in your own room back home,” Roy promises. 

The grin Caitlyn sends his way is pure Edward in triumph. No one can deny who she belonged to with that smile. 

Ed gathers his children in his arms and tries not to weep. Roy, with his freakishly long arms, embraces them all, vowing to never let them go. 

_\--_

Roy closes the book in his hand and presses a kiss to his daughter’s hair as she sleeps. He arranges the sheets around her to check that she has Cat with her. Ed smiles from his perch on the doorway, an effervescent joy in his chest. 

Roy comes up to him, kisses him on the mouth in greeting, and heads on to the room across for Reece’s turn with storytime. 

Ed turns to their bedroom and takes stock of the suitcase on the bed. He undoes the clasps and unfolds it, amused at the military efficiency of the packing. He empties the case, hanging the uniforms and suits neatly in the closet while the other clothes are placed in the drawers where they used to reside. 

He’s about to go to the bathroom when Roy comes in, sees that he has unpacked already, and offers to do something for him in return. 

“Oh, you’re doing something for me all right,” Ed counters. 

Roy’s smile has taken on a lascivious slant and he winds his arms around his husband, nosing at his neck. 

“I am yours to use as you please,” Roy states solemnly. 

“You might want to hold off on saying that so quickly,” Ed hedges but he doesn’t detach himself from the embrace. 

“I’m serious, Ed. I have never wanted to belong to somebody as much as I wanted to be yours. And now, I am also Reece’s and Caitlyn’s and I can never be happier knowing who owns my heart and soul.” 

“Sap.” 

“That’s General Sap to you.” 

The kiss feels like a million years in the making. A lush press of lips before an opening, tongues licking as if to taste their very essence. It quickly becomes bruising in its intensity, both determined to give and take and burn in their passion. 

Roy’s kiss will always be love and contentment and fire. It has always been a declaration of intent, a prelude to the desire pulsing in his veins. There was nothing more that inflamed Ed more than this particular kiss and Roy suffused his entire being with petrol. 

And then they were moving, he is against him, in him, a punched thrust that makes everything in Ed’s mind disappear save for the thought that it feels right—like coming home. Release is a wave that crashes his being, leaving him feeling like he landed on his knees after a complete freefall. 

Breaths are shared, words unspoken, but the message is clear: _I am yours, you are mine, I love you, I miss you, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…_

_\--_

“You need to clear your schedule for one tomorrow,” Ed says sleepily, satiated from a really good fuck, though Roy will claim it was love making. 

“Hmm?” Roy asks, caressing a hip that still remains narrow despite years of inactive service to the military. 

“Al wants to have lunch with us,” Ed informs. “Winry’s gonna be there, too.” 

Roy freezes in the spot and stutters, “Ed, my sunshine, light of my life, I thought you’d appreciate a few more years of wedded bliss before your brother and sister tear me apart. At least allow me to see my children grow up and walk Caitlyn down the aisle.” 

Ed snorts, thoroughly enjoying himself. “Tough titties. And besides, Al won’t tear you from limb to limb. His style is a slow-acting poison that will rot you inside before he heals you and does it all over again. And Winry will just beat you to death with a wrench.” 

“We’re moving to Drachma. The children better know how to hunt and gather firewood.” 

“Stop it, you paranoid nut job,” Ed orders, rolling away from him. Roy stares at him mulishly, bereft. 

“Al just wants to make sure that I know what I’m doing, as he knew how much our separation affected me.” 

“And I can never apologise enough for that—” 

“Shut up, not finished. He’s my brother, we protect each other, that’s the deal. I mean, it should be my job but we both know I needed him more this time. Winry’s been saying that she should have been there for me more, too.” 

Roy picks at the duvet in contemplation. “Al was the one who encouraged me to come after you after Ling made that announcement,” he confesses. “He made it clear what that declaration meant, and that you have options. Better ones. But it didn’t matter because I was the one you wanted.” 

“Bloody hell, Al…” Ed jams a pillow on his face and hopes that he suffocates painlessly. 

“It gave me the courage to go, and tell you everything I have wanted to say since you told me you were leaving.” 

Roy removes the pillow from Ed’s face and stokes his cheek. 

“Yeah, did you practice that speech in front of the mirror?” Ed mumbles but leans his face into the warm palm. 

“Everyday. Even wrote it down so I knew exactly what to say if you had given me the chance.” 

Ed leans up, gives him a kiss and nudges him back to a position best for sleeping. 

“I love you.” 

“I love you, too.” 

_\--_

_“Hey, now that Ling declared me as like, basically Xing royalty, Al can actually use the Xing army against Amestris if he thought I was in danger.”_

_“Please don’t joke about that. While I was threatening Ling with retaliation, their armies are five times the size of ours.”_

_“Well, good to note.”_

_“Edward…”_

_“Haha, you guys are hilarious. I have decided something and it’s of utter importance, put the newspaper down and listen.”_

_“I’m listening.”_

_“You are a disaster and when you attain your dreams of being Fuhrer, I will be the woman behind the scenes. Except that I’m a man, you know.”_

_“Pray tell what does that entail?”_

_“Reece and I have been reading some history books for some light entertainment. Did you know that there is a famous king in Aerugo who lived about five hundred years ago? He was noted for being one of the wisest and fair kings who ruled and he was an amazing General to boot. He commanded armies that allowed his territory to expand up to three times it size before he got the throne. So, anyway, this king had a queen who was proven to be the brains behind it all. She was like, scarily efficient and hella smart, and knew how to navigate the politics. He trusted her implicitly with everything. They were so beloved by the nation they were worshipped as gods.”_

_“So, do you want to be worshipped as a god?”_

_“No, you moron, I mean, I want to be like that queen for you, someone to ease your burden, someone you can come home to and someone you can trust.”_

_“You already do that for me, and so much more, my sunshine.”_

_“Yes, but I want to do more, you know. And the kids are growing up, they will start being their own people—I mean, how scary is that?—and then there’s you. You will need all the help you can get. I can be behind you, beside you, on top of you… Everywhere you need me.”_

_“Well, that is a tempting offer, however, I would like to negotiate terms.”_

_“Pfft. Here we go.”_

_“All I ask is one thing: That you remain by my side until my heart stops beating.”_

_“Cool. I’ll even throw in my undying devotion.”_

_“See, you’re already becoming a better negotiator than I would ever be.”_

_“I do have three PhD’s and speak six languages.”_

_“Stop, you had the job the minute you came off the train from Creta ten years ago and demanded where I was taking you for dinner.”_

_“Ah. Hey, what you said earlier. What if you had a heart attack and your heart stops for like a minute, does that count? Can I leave you then for a younger model?”_

Nothing else but laughter is heard throughout the house.


End file.
